It started a couple of days ago, and I barely noticed, but this evening, when the discouragement ran deep, when so many things piled on, one on top of another, it was clearer, stronger.
Just as the sun started to go down one little solitary bird sang a few notes. And then the darkness descended and fell, and when the darkness descended, the bird sang loud and strong, right outside my window. I still didn't understand.
"That bird is so funny," I tell my husband, "why is he singing? It's nightime." And now it is midnight, close to the darkest hour, and right outside my window, he has sung yet another clear, strong, solitary song.
I do believe it is a sign from You, my Father in Heaven. I have been in a season of night. And we know that "joy comes in the morning". But even in this season of night, there can be a song, and it is unexpected and more obvious than if it had been at the normal times.
Perhaps I can choose to sing just like this bird parked right outside my window. And my song doesn't have to be fake. It doesn't have to say my circumstances are perfect, or that I am perfect (far from it), but maybe it can be a sacrifice of praise. The song itself is not that beautiful, but it is the offering, the daring to sing like it is morning when it is the middle of the night. For the Lord is my light. And He alone is my strength and my song.
Thank you Lord, that in this time of night, and when the sorrow and disappointment can run deep, that we can learn from Your creation to sing in the night. That You alone are our song, not our circumstances, our crushed dreams, our dashed hopes. And in the darkest night, the songs come out clear and strong, clearer and stronger than they would in the bright day.
And so it is with You my Father. Your songs calm my heart and touch me more when my sufferings envelope me.
There is a theology of suffering, and I know it is a good study, a good, strong study. One of the best. And you allow those whom you love to suffer. But as of now, I am too weary to completely understand. All I know is "Your strength is made perfect in weakness" and you have truly given me
songs in the night.
Thank you my Father. You weary daughter, who must go to bed.
i am learning that NOW is the time to practice all He has shown me. when it's more of an effort then the week before, THAT's when i need to do it all the more. that's when it's put to the test. and perhaps, that's the time He showed "it" to me for.
ReplyDeletethe goal/focus isn't whether it's day or night. because He, our source remains the same regardless of it being day or night to us, in our limited perspective.
keep on fighting sister.